I know you want me to want you, I want to...

I am an unfortunate line of events that has created a 25yr old indebted soul searching fool. Well, the key word in that was debt, and I know and have a lot of it. Mainly to due to education that I so lacklessly, and tactlessly, obtained. But I graduated, and that must count for something. In fact, in this day and age, you're lucky to have obtained that degree and not be working flipping burgers. That might have been to the extreme, but at the very, and most significantly, you're very unlikely to settle into a field you've chosen. And such is the society we have created: where I, as a tax-paying and contributing citizen, must pay over 100k to attend a university, and live life and fund all its other expenses while doing it. And this does not at all stop there, but at the end of the unemployment line.

Sure, if you had taken the opportunities that were presented to you, or more re-affirmingly, that were bought for you, and succeed with an above-respectable GPA, you will certainly be employed, gainfully, depending on the field. But most of us earth dwellers, must fight out a slimming job force to take a job that barely gets us by.

And there is our society; almost too capitalistic.

I'll never give up, but look around, many have. Even those just making ends meet, look at them, they have given up while getting by, which may be even worse, not economically, solely indivually.

I don't support an all-anything government, but to think that a socialist policy or two might not hurt us isn't a damning idea. We have many social programs that function properly, for the most part(everything can improve, and thus is our goal as humans), and are necessary for our continuity in this society. Firemen and Police. Mass Transportation. Pre-Secondary Education.

Capitalism thrives on the idea that Darwin did. Survival of the fittest. And to not have a humanitarian view, especially at at time where more are struggling than have ever, is ignorant. Rich can still be rich. The lazy can still lie dormant. The motivated can still find a way.

My writing is very eratical and I can honestly barely read it; I'm not or will I ever follow one direct path. How am I as a being to present this world with such an open mess. And I try to answer that daily; and fought hard and won the battle today. Everyday writing and trying and producing, whether negative, positive or neutral to this world is still a try. And I have and will always believe that try is the best we are. And when we produce so does the world. Such is physics; for every action there is a reaction. I keep to that, that any action of good nature, maybe thoroughly repeated, yes, but these actions can change the world for the better. No matter if its the entire one, or just one's.

pura vida.